do you ever get random bursts of confidence and plan to do something then later wither in shyness
every thirty minutes or so
an attempt at lettering the ineffable.
i usually don’t do this, but some things we just have to deal with on a case to case basis:
I loved, love, and will love you.
Whether you’re here or there, anywhere.
Just as you are and who you will be. Just as who you have been
whether your life has me out or you in.
even though im quiet, or sometimes spitting fire,
i hope you eventually understood why.
if ill forever stay just beyond sight.
its the only way i know to do it right,
Love is not a sin.
what is 100 years?
how does it feel,
most of us will never know.
100 seconds feels like eternity
when you’re waiting for the red light.
or for the patrol with his baynonet
waiting, hiding, waiting for him to just pass by.
100 days feels like 100 nights
when your home was swallowed by the sea
100 nights feels just right
when panata is answered from HIM.
100 days feels like 100 tons
when Holy supper comes
and you weigh out what you have done
100 blessings feels superfluous
when repenting for that wasted one.
patient tears and facing fear,
feels like 100 years, when they invade a thought
huh? when did i begin?
100 minutes feels like a gust of wind
when your paper is due by midnight.
100 days feels like hours,
in early september school days.
100 months can feel like all the epic myths retold all night, around the fire.
or transpire as brief as a sneeze
when your baby goes from asking you for kisses talking about wishes
to asking for the car keys and college tuition
100 weeks is brief once you’re a graduate
or infinite, study grind when you’re a freshman
what is 100 tears?
the longest expectation
culled in an instant of revelation,
within the water is all the time, all the memories in each drop, held
cleansing, cast the weighty ages back like a spell.
mind back to timelessness of rest and repose.
and there the tangent goes. this prose is off oh no.
100 years is the same as 100 days, or 100 minutes
its the value of each moment, each thing that is life
that you relish it, remembering each lengthy experience,
along with each brief feeling and images
collected upon all of those come and gone,
entire lives lived long and each story has a passion,
let ourselves forget their tales,
those moments pass in flashes.
dont. forget. honor and preserve
for all which before us came and bled
but when all is said and done
we have yet really begun.
100 years built up towards the everlasting
and eternity is everything down to one.
i gave up
had to make up
and move on.
i got a job to do.
the worst is never the worst, the bible says it.
the sorrow makes the music sweeter
keeps the fire going.
happiness makes sappy hits
loss creates art.
I wish I could tell the story now,
but not yet.
but out of the darkness, he gave me the song.
and i mean darkness.
I lost my job. my sense of security. I had to leave my family. At one moment i had to be assessed of my sanity, my emotional state was given a rating and prescription.
I have been stripped of many things, which less than a month ago, defined me, my sense of security, my source of inspiration.
but i know, truly, that God has broken first; which he wills to recreate.
I do not know exactly what, but I am ready.
I have waited my whole life to be…
i know it sounds silly, ok.
To know who i am my whole life, knowing i am not it,just yet. Yet, knowing it will be…and not know who, or what that,will be. if that made any sense, yee.
I just have to remember to pray more, to trust more. His love…
Love never fails.